This is the official blog of ex-Sgt Ellie Bloggs. I was a real live police constable then sergeant for twelve years, on the real live front line of England. I'm now a real live non-police person. All the facts I recount are true, and are not secrets. If they don't want me blogging about it, they shouldn't do it. PS If you don't pay tax, you don't (or didn't) pay my salary.


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Sunday, July 08, 2007

Good News!

We can all sleep easy in our beds: it is only going to take fifteen years to defeat terrorism.

In this time, we can expect to eradicate all extremism and emerge into a new era where human beings no longer kill each other. Instead, all will embrace the British way of life. A worthy aim.

This will be achieved through the novel approach of getting people to inform on their neighbours and family. The government has finally realised that crime should not be investigated by the ill-equipped police forces and information agencies of this country, but by the general public. Indeed, I would go further and say that the public should be held accountable not only for all acts of terrorism they fail to stop, but also for their local detection and arrest figures.

Members of public should moreover keep themselves updated on the status of their crimes - it just isn't good enough that they don't know whether the police have caught their burglars yet or whether there is CCTV of the incident.

Blandshire Constabulary is way ahead of the government here, and long since introduced the idea of handing responsibility for investigations over to the public. Only we call it Neighbourhood Policing.

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Copyright of PC Bloggs.

10 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

15 years? whered that come from?

08 July, 2007 20:18

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Admiral Sir Alan West whoever he might be when he's up and dressed.
"gunner"

09 July, 2007 00:10

 
Blogger malpas said...

This will enable furthering of the stalinist state.
Already the police 'check' on anyone near children. This 'informer idea ' will enable them to have concierge watches on all buildings. The KGB will help you if you don't know how.
Plus the high yellow visibility as a reminder to the public not to be rebellious.

09 July, 2007 00:22

 
Blogger McNoddy said...

Like anon, I wondered where the 15 years estimate came from. Why not 14 or 16? Perhaps it's part of a 5 year Stalinist plan to accompany the idea of spying on your neighbours and reporting them to the Police.

Perhaps I should hide my patio gas bottles now. Wouldn't want to waste my colleagues' time checking me out would I?

09 July, 2007 01:46

 
Blogger Busy said...

Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean everyone isn't out to get you.

09 July, 2007 13:02

 
Blogger Hal Apeno said...

I love your idea of the public having to attain performance figures, maybe it could be linked to council tax or local services like rubbish collection.
Great idea Bloggs, keep the good work :-)

09 July, 2007 17:00

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

All this for some fools with a car full of camping gas and petrol! Drink Drivers kill more people every month. You couldn't make it up.

10 July, 2007 10:07

 
Blogger Whichendbites said...

Like Noddy I wonder at why 15 years ? Perhps this is to give them more time in power to try to 'sort the matter out'.

Either way they've got no chance.

As one move is made to tighten things up or make things harder, several other alternatives come out from any number of political, radical, civil libertarian or other hole in the woodwork somewhere. What ever is proposed will offend someone, some group or infringe the rights of said one or group.

Politicians need to take stock of what is going on and put in place measures that will protect the people and not pander to the whinging masses. Easy answer is to hold referendums on sensitive issues from the people of society and not be held to ransom by trying to appease the minorities and place everyone else at risk.

We have not the resources nor support to crack this one easily.
Generally people claim to support but do not want inconvenience. Thats what will happen. When anything is done we are labelled fascists, racists, anything else'ists when it suits.
The terrorists hide within the confines and protection of their communities. The Forces of good are clearly seen and are the only ones who have to play by the rules.
The terrorists are not accountable and the good guys are. I think it was the views of the deputy Australian premier, I believe, who has the right idea.

10 July, 2007 17:06

 
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