This is the official blog of ex-Sgt Ellie Bloggs. I was a real live police constable then sergeant for twelve years, on the real live front line of England. I'm now a real live non-police person. All the facts I recount are true, and are not secrets. If they don't want me blogging about it, they shouldn't do it. PS If you don't pay tax, you don't (or didn't) pay my salary.

(All proceeds from Google Ads will be donated to the Police Roll of Honour Trust)

Friday, December 19, 2008

The weight of the world...

A link my email is on the top right of my sidebar. This means I receive on average 2-3 emails per month about one of the following:
  1. Can I explain why the police took so long to turn up to the sender's burglary last week.
  2. The sender was arrested last night over a domestic where all he did was push his partner, and he was kept in custody for NINE hours. This was ridiculous. I am asked to advise how he can claim compensation and have the officers in question fired.
  3. A police officer wearing a poorly-ironed shirt told the sender to move his/her car out of an are where the sender really thought he should have been able to park. When the sender politely queried whether this was necessary, the officer issued him a ticket. Please can I account for this behaviour.
  4. Why, even though the sender in no way wanted anyone prosecuted, did police insist on arresting his cousin for a heated scrap over a mutual relative? This has ruined a good relationship and is my fault personally.
Sometimes I reply to these emails. Sometimes I point the sender in the direction of my blog. It frustrates me that, no matter how much police bloggers talk about it, the public still do not seem to grasp that front-line police officers are just as pissed off with bureaucracy and jobsworthiness as they are. Or that we are not each responsible for everything that anyone wearing all or part of a police uniform does.

You might wonder why I leave my email address up there.

Well, I get other emails too. I hear from rape victims confiding in me about how the criminal justice system treated them. I hear from the families of people who have been murdered, whose killers received a pittance in jail time, and how it has affected them. I also sometimes hear from the families of the killers, and that can be just as moving. I hear from people who support my- our- efforts, and who appreciate that the job we do each day will always have beneficiaries and losers. I keep all the emails, and sometimes I read some of them again.

Keep getting in touch.

As long as you don't expect me to rescind your speeding ticket/sympathise with your wife-battering/pay you compensation, all emails will be carefully considered and your privacy respected.

'Diary of an On-Call Girl' is available in some bookstores and online.


Anonymous ginnersinner said...

'But they pay your wages!!!'

I had to laugh yesterday. I was in custody and some posh bloke phoned up to threaten us all with a 'wave of lawyers' to 'have a word with you' about the arrest of his son, and inform us that he personally was flying back from some foreign land to 'sort us all out' and demand the immediate release of his progeny.

Unfortunately for him the phone was picked up by the Super who was there doing an extension!!!!!!!! I nearly cried when - clearly in response to asking to be put through to 'whoever was in charge' - the govenor responded 'I'm in charge, good day to you' and put the phone down!!!!! I don't think he called back!

19 December, 2008 20:44

Blogger staghounds said...

Those occasional messages are a third of the reason I do this. Blandmore is very fortunate.

19 December, 2008 22:42

Blogger thinblueline said...

thing is tho you never replied to all my advances to a red hot rv at the back of the local Cafe...

19 December, 2008 23:05

Anonymous BJ said...

LOL. That's why I never tell people I'm a solicitor - I get enough trouble from the people who know I am:

1. Work colleague: My girlfriend was fired from her work in the nursing home for accidentally giving an overdose to a patient.
Me: That's no good. Did she?
WC: Yeah, but her boss said it was alright because other people have done much worse things, now they're just trying to get rid of her because they're all so bitchy there.
Me: Uh huh.
WC: Do you think we have a case for unfair dismissal?
Me: I'm not an employment lawyer, but at a guess: no.
2. Taxi driver who saw me leaving the court house: Yeah, so, like I bought this house at an auction and there's no cooling off period right, but now there's termite damage in one of the back rooms...
Me: Did you get a building inspection (idiot don't answer just feign sleep)
TD: Yeah but they only pick up the active termites not all the damage! What should I do?
Me: Zzzz.

In my experience the people who ask you those questions have no appreciation of irony, therefore it is likely they stumbled on your blog in error (by googling womble sex or whatever) not with the intention of actually reading it. These are the type of people who cannot believe their own luck at having secured the rapt attention of a serving police officer.

My advice: As they are not your readers you are entitled to have a little fun with them.

Merry Christmas.

Regards, BJ

PS. I'm a Nightjack reader and got here through his sidebar link.

20 December, 2008 01:55

Blogger Auntie Jane said...

I suppose I can understand why you get emails as you mention. I have wondered why it takes so long for anyone to turn up when called in the past.

But after reading a lot of police blogs over the last year, including reading your book and PC Copperfields and Gadget's, I have a much better understanding of what our police are up against.

I admit that I had no idea how your hands were tied.

I still find it hard to understand how someone with 'previous' can constantly go un-punished... well, no punishment given that prevents them re-offending. I thought it was the fault of the police... I didn't realise it had nothing to do with police.

I still can't get my head around the way our legal system constantly put there people back out on the streets to re-offend.

At least now I know it is not the fault of the police. You would like these people put away just as much as we - the general public - would.

Happy Christmas. I hope you get some days off over the holiday, but I suspect your work is doubled, especially at the New Year celebrations... I shall be tucked up at home, hopefully safe and sound!

20 December, 2008 08:52

Anonymous Dr Melvin T Gray said...

Whilst it can hold no surprise, it must be a very strange feeling to have one's nuts pulled when feeding monkeys through the bars.

20 December, 2008 08:59

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Need more material for the book, I suppose.

You are a hypocrite and bottom-feeder who feasts upon other people's misery.

20 December, 2008 17:34

Anonymous TheBinarySurfer said...

Surely those e-mails are overwhelmingly junk though? I mean how many bad e-mails do you have to sift through to find a good one.

Then again i suppose if you can trawl through a dozen crap jobs to find one real one day-in-day-out you can do it here?

22 December, 2008 02:04

Blogger PC Common Sense said...

Thats all lovely but nothing changes does it.

22 December, 2008 23:36

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Now look here Mr Anonymouse(sic), there are thousands of people out there in Elsewhereshire who absolutely revel in misery, utter despair, their miserable rotton lives, their miserable dysfunctional offspring, their emotional poverty, their translucent pasty skin and greasy skanky hair and rotten teeth, with nothing but supplementary benefit and one lousy shag a week to look forward to. Is it any wonder they phone the cops for no reason whatsoever? They're in pain for goodness sake! And some of us need to know about it so we can get to feel superior for once in our rotten lives - so back off WPC Bloggs and don't try and shoot the messenger, you paragon of dirge and misery. Happy Christmas.

23 December, 2008 13:13

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