This is the official blog of ex-Sgt Ellie Bloggs. I was a real live police constable then sergeant for twelve years, on the real live front line of England. I'm now a real live non-police person. All the facts I recount are true, and are not secrets. If they don't want me blogging about it, they shouldn't do it. PS If you don't pay tax, you don't (or didn't) pay my salary.

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Monday, September 28, 2009

No more targets for Blandmore

Newsflash: Blandshire Constabulary has officially abolished any target for detecting any type of crime and we've all had face-to-face training from the superintendent telling us so. I will therefore not be posting any more out-of-date whinging moaning diatribes about target culture in the 21st Century police service.

We still have to reduce violent crime by 15% and detect 5% more race hate. But that's because the victims of those crimes want us to, which means it's not a target, it's VICTIM FOCUS.

'Diary of an On-Call Girl' is available in some bookstores and online.


Anonymous pcR said...

I haven't spoken to a superintendent face to face for over three years.
Is this a record?

28 September, 2009 21:06

Blogger PCDC-Copper Bottom said...

not had any contact at all with my Chief-Supt since he started work at my station - more than 3-years ago...

except for when i picked up a commendation.

'well done... err...'
'copper bottom, sir'

'oh yes... have you been at this station for long copper?'
'8-years sir...'

'oh... what do you do?'
'manage your sex-offenders sir...'

know what I am saying, homes?

28 September, 2009 22:22

Blogger Bill Sticker said...

Sooo, 'victim focus' is your new 'target' right?

29 September, 2009 00:05

Blogger Joker said...

Which seems like an excellent cue to raise the case of Fiona Pilkington and her children. Is 'victim focus'the latests buzzword for allaying public anger at how they were let down by Laura Norder?

Don't get me wrong, I expect to hear the other side of the story here, about how the police's hands are tied and they can't keep coming out to attend incidents where all they can do is offer unhelpful advice. This must be something that can only be addressed with the willing co-operation of police, social services, and parents, but does an anonymous PC have any thoughts about how that can come about?

29 September, 2009 11:21

Blogger Joker said...

Cynical, even brutal thoughts, are welcome too, by the way.

But seriously, 'victim focus'? Or really bovine matter?

29 September, 2009 11:48

Anonymous Anonymous said...

No targets apart from this need to reduce violent crime by 15%. They're now using this new buzz bollocks of "VICTIM FOCUS" to justify the target. When in fact the target is required to be met for the Supt. to recieve his/her anual bonus.

By even saying this they are implying that as there is now no target to reduce offences such as burglary then the burglary victim is not as bothered about the offender being caught and reoffending.Which we all know is total bollocks.

Who do these arrogant knackers think they are kidding?. We can see through all the bullshit and double speak. We do not need patronising lectures about "VICTIM FOCUS" and how important it is to keep a victim informed. Any decent copper knows all this. We just need the resources and time to be able to do the job properly.

I personaly want to be left to just get on with the job without having to jump through this years hoops to ensure matey boy upstairs gets his fat cheque next May.

VICTIM FOCUS really equals nothing more than some pencil necked SMT twat getting a promotion for stating the bleeding obvious and then spending a whole load of tax payers cash on presentations, lectures, leaflets and posters. Instead what really needs to happen is said twat needs to be booted out and the considerable amount of cash spent on his wages put into training new cops to plod the streets and keep the scum at bay.


29 September, 2009 13:08

Anonymous Pete said...

AC/DC Coppers' Bottom

(Bottom guy)?


..... your point is *what*, exactly?

29 September, 2009 14:52

Blogger PCDC-Copper Bottom said...

Holy Moly... you are hard work eh?

Copper bottomed investment from the nautical - (as most are in English)... When ship builders hit on the idea of using copper plates to seal the bottom of a ships hull... This gained the reputation of being a 'sound' way to make a ship watertight and preventing rot...

This passed into popular parlance as meaning- 'something sound and safe'.

Not ignorant... or rude. Shame we can not say the same about other posters eh?

29 September, 2009 17:55

Anonymous Anonymous said...

come on, don't belittle Ellie's blogg with squabbles - it just isn't worth it.

29 September, 2009 21:53

Blogger Nathaniel said...


Thanks for sharing the useful information.

Officer's have routine patrols in which they check certain things, depending on the area they patrol. There are parking lots, banks, stores, and many other areas that need their own special type of protection. Sometimes even certain people need the protection of an officer. we can be a police officer and help put the miscreants in jail.

30 September, 2009 11:41

Blogger PC Bloggs said...

Comments off topic will be deleted, unless they're really funny or interesting, or are raving about my inspired intellect and obvious brilliance.

30 September, 2009 15:17

Anonymous A.J. Wimble said...

I want better policing and if I believed that targets were the way to get this I would be all infavour. The problem is I believe targets are jjst there to generate lots of paperwork and give politicians nice easily digestable numbers that they can quote to show how great they are.

01 October, 2009 16:43

Anonymous NottsSarge said...

Targets...there are no targets. Except these ones...

It's a bit like league tables. They don't exist. Except these ones here...

Accountability is fine. Unfortunately, the day you spend dealing, with unusual empathy, with a sudden death, counts for nothing. You have been UNPRODUCTIVE!

The sooner we ditch this whole farcical idea of the Police being like a business, with an 'end product', the better. No doubt, even now, finer brains than any of us (and I have two degrees!) will be working out how to quantify proactive, preventative patrol and present it in a nice traffic-light format.

According to the HO website, robberies where I live are up by 200%! I will be writing a strongly worded letter to my MP. That's 2 robberies by the way. I have marked the decline of civilisation in my Federation diary...

02 October, 2009 01:56

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Great article. I've just known about it from this information. Thanks for sharing.

24 October, 2009 01:57


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