This is the official blog of Sgt Ellie Bloggs, a real live police sergeant on the front line of England. It's not the official opinion of my police force, but all the facts I recount are true, and are not secrets. If they don't want me blogging about it, they shouldn't do it. PS If you don't pay tax, you don't pay my salary.


(All proceeds from Google Ads will be donated to the Police Roll of Honour Trust)

Sunday, July 27, 2008

Thank you

I'll take links from anyone. Anyone.

This might be going too far.

Still, thanks for the thought. Nice to know my efforts are appreciated.

Who knows, perhaps the author of the linked site has an ex-girlfriend who was a copper. Or perhaps it's all a wind-up. Then again, I get that kind of language on a weekly basis on the streets of Blandmore. For some, as soon as a woman gets a teeny bit of authority, she automatically transmogrifies into a lesbian or slapper, or both.

Here are some things I have been called in the last month by people who have never met me before:
  • "Whore."
  • "Slag."
  • "Big fat dyke."
  • "Bitch-fucking mother-cunt."
  • "Sad little pathetic power-trippin lesbo. Innit."
  • "Blond trollope." (I am NOT blond. But the speaker clearly felt that "nondescript-shade-of-brown trollope" didn't have the same ring to it.)
Here is what I called the people in return:
There are a lot of people who hate the police, just because they are the police. There are just as many people who hate women, just because they are women. Funnily enough, it tends to be the same group of people. I gave up taking it personally after about three weeks.

Anyway, I got three referrals from the above site in the last few hours alone, so who's complaining...

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'Diary of an On-Call Girl' is available in some bookstores and online.

28 Comments:

Anonymous PECKHAM PC said...

Yipeeeeeee I'm First (kinda like my sex life...Ahem)

"You do not have to say anything, but it may harm your defence if you do not mention... oh just shut up!"

- I Had to laugh. Generally someone who gets abusive with me doesn't get the caution until they are sitting, Cuffed in the rear of a van (remember, it's Cautioning 'as soon as practicable').

Oh, and please take a look at the links.

"Women shouldn't be allowed to be police officers, because they are not as strong or as smart as men.

I want the best of the best protecting me and my family, not some wannabe dyke who only got the job because she's a chick."

He's obviously not met the strong, independant and smart female officers that i work with in Peckham.

The twat ! x

27 July, 2008 16:40

 
Anonymous MB said...

You will probably find that these men are scared off women, maybe they have small prckers and dont want a real women to laugh at tehm :P

MB

27 July, 2008 17:42

 
Anonymous MB said...

that was obviously meant to be 'peckers'

27 July, 2008 17:43

 
Blogger Dick Masterson said...

"...perhaps the author of the linked site has an ex-girlfriend who was a copper."

I think you mean "perhaps the author of a comment on the forum of the linked site..." etc.

That being said, women have no business on the police force. Compared to men, you guys are dumb as hell. Strength doesn't even need to enter the debate.

-Dick

27 July, 2008 18:53

 
Blogger Unsworth said...

And how often do you get call 'Officer' by the public?

Seriously.

27 July, 2008 20:20

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I was called lesbian once, by a gentleman arrested for assault.

I think I might be the butchest lesbian ever, at 6'2", 17 stone and a married male with children :)

I expect that if the comments for that site aren't made in jest, they are being unintentionally funny anyway :)

28 July, 2008 03:45

 
Blogger Metcountymounty said...

unsworth, quite often but usually by tourists, the rest are people asking directions as the people we generally deal with call us anything but!!

I had hoped for a sec when i was reading that link that they were being sarcastic but obviously no such luck, I guess at least that some of the underclass are using their free benefits to invest in IT from PC world and get free tuition on how to use them at the local Poly. Until they get wankered and start beating each other up because they obviously haven't got females partners to do it to. Some people just need to get laid more and be happy!!

28 July, 2008 07:32

 
Blogger Virtual Supply said...

Some men just don't get it...

First link is busted! Some one must have pulled it quick. Pull the whole BNP as soon as you like.

28 July, 2008 07:47

 
Anonymous Peckham PC said...

I can Believe that 'Dick' is a real person (although the name obviously fits).

"That being said, women have no business on the police force. Compared to men, you guys are dumb as hell. Strength doesn't even need to enter the debate."

Women...Dumb...A sweeping statement if ever i've heard one. And compared to Men, some of the women i work with are intelligent as hell (have you ever seen a Level-2 Carrier full of blokes. Not the most intelligent people in the world!)

Oh, and Dick, Its a Police Service, not a Force. Thats the idea. We don't use force. We talk to people as much as possible.

Said it before, and i'll say it again.

Twat !

28 July, 2008 08:54

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am a man. I am also a Police Officer. What continues to surprise me is the number of members of the public who assume that when I’m crewed up with a female colleague that I’m there to protect her and look after her.

As a man, although I am physically stronger than most women I think you’ll find that I am not:
-stab or bullet proof.
-impervious to pain and injury.
-able to shoot laser beams out of my eyes (although this would be pretty cool).
-smarter than every women, ever.

On our relief everybody does their best to look out for each other and I think we all agree that ‘Dick’ needs to get out more and socialise

28 July, 2008 09:11

 
Anonymous Dave H. said...

"...you guys are as dumb as hell..."

Those gals should get out less.

Don't worry too much though, it's not like they're going to breed.

Who was it that said 'women lactate and men dictate'?

28 July, 2008 10:37

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I've read your blog for ages (OK I never got round to buying the book but that's because I'm lazy as opposed to tight).

I've got a few names to call you that you can add to your list.

Funny,witty,sarcastic,eloquent.

For the record I'm neuther pro-police nor anti-police I just like a good read where the author tells it as it is.

MoSsy

28 July, 2008 10:44

 
Blogger PC Bloggs said...

Anon, you say men are not:
"-stab or bullet proof.
-impervious to pain and injury.
-able to shoot laser beams out of my eyes (although this would be pretty cool).
-smarter than every women, ever."

You've dashed my most sacred beliefs!

Just in general, this wasn't an invitation for woman-(or man-)bashing. Just an example of what the police, male and female, put up with on a daily basis.

28 July, 2008 11:07

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

My most inventive insult was, "I feel sorry for your husband having to put a bag over your head when he shags you!" My response, "Oh, you know him then?" lol

28 July, 2008 12:06

 
Anonymous TheBinarySurfer said...

Transmogrify? That's a big word for a woman isn't it?

Ooops! ;)

28 July, 2008 12:41

 
Blogger Joe said...

Bloggsy, did the big mean man make you cry?!? There there! :-p

I would like to request that you not link to such imbeciles again, one brief look at that site and I am now actually too stupid to actually finish the research that I was supposed to be doing!

28 July, 2008 13:50

 
Anonymous dickiebo said...

Before anyone says otherwise - I maybe a 'Dick', but not 'the' Dick! OK?

28 July, 2008 14:00

 
OpenID inspectorgadget said...

"For some, as soon as a woman gets a teeny bit of authority....."

Bloggsy I thought you were a British Police Officer.....

We are simply political stooges with no influence or authority.

Bah, humbug.

28 July, 2008 17:04

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Bloggsy, to show feminine superiority you should refer to the theory, endorsed by my wife, that if there is a God, it's a female with a sense of humour as who else would give a man a brain and a penis but only enough blood to operate one at a time! I haven't found a riposte to that yet (despite 8 years searching for one).
Plodnomore

28 July, 2008 20:54

 
Anonymous tpk361 said...

I think the link is an obvious wind up! Some people have a chip on their shoulder about the police and I think these idiots fall into that category (Probably the same idiots that phone 999 within a millisecond of their car being vandalised!)

28 July, 2008 21:45

 
Anonymous geraint said...

anon 16:15@ - you say police brutality usually occurs because someone is having a "bad day"? and you stick together and cover it up because of teamwork and would not be inclined to report it. Regargless of the fact that it criminal behaviour - it is by one of your own. So that's OK then.

Well at least you're honest about it.

- PC Bloggs, how long ago could this offence be that you saw? You've not been in the job *that* long.. and is there a statute of limitations on criminal assault in this country? You still know this guy's name - so why not do your sworn duty and let due process determine whether or not he should be prosecuted. Or there again, sanction criminal behaviour because it by one of your own, eh?


Metcounty mounty - go look up what "apologist" actually means, theres a clever chap. [Hint it is NOT someone who apologises]... talk about irony (sigh)

28 July, 2008 19:21
Anonymous Tpk361 said...

28 July, 2008 23:37

 
Blogger Ex-RUC said...

I well remember the female officers in the RUC, even during Sir Jack Hermon's time when he refused to arm them. I particularly remember one - very beautiful - lass who insisted on going on a dangerous raid, despite having no gun or body armour. Later, when the girls were armed, they were second to none. I was the insp who first authorised two female officers alone in a car in bandit country. I don't know whether to be proud or ashamed.

29 July, 2008 00:01

 
Blogger staghounds said...

You were called a blonde Trollope?

I wouldn't have thought your MOPs' tastes ran to upmarket family dramas and romances that somewhat transcend these genres via striking realism in terms of human psychology and relationships.

29 July, 2008 01:35

 
Blogger uniform said...

Oi Bloggs, I see you have an advert for that beautifully (permanently pregnant) proportioned TV presenter Sarah Beeny.

She can plaster my back bedroom; extend my living space, any time.

Are you a regular visitor to her dating site?

29 July, 2008 08:17

 
Blogger PC Bloggs said...

I have no control over the Google Ads (other than to remove them altogether), although I did complain once when there was an ad for "Battered Wives - Want a No-Strings Relationship", above a post on domestic violence! All the proceeds of the ads go to the Police Roll of Honour Trust, so I generally put up with it...

29 July, 2008 09:46

 
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15 April, 2009 10:40

 

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