This is the official blog of Sgt Ellie Bloggs, a real live police sergeant on the front line of England. It's not the official opinion of my police force, but all the facts I recount are true, and are not secrets. If they don't want me blogging about it, they shouldn't do it. PS If you don't pay tax, you don't pay my salary.


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Friday, October 26, 2007

The Unreal Criminals

As a reader has kindly pointed out, I spend most of my time dealing not with The Mob, but the mob.




The "real" mob.







In the Twenty-First Century, there are now more ways than ever to become a criminal. Whereas a 'criminal record' used to be the sacred preserve of those who actually stole, damaged things, hurt people or used illegal drugs, you can now become a crook by just carrying out some everyday activities:

In this way the police nowadays can crack down on criminal behaviour before it actually becomes criminal. I therefore support any new law that makes something illegal.

One of the reasons for the successful criminalisation of the bulk of society is the National Crime Recording Standards. I go on about these from time to time, so at the risk of boring my regular readers, these are a set of rules that dictate how and when the police must record and detect crime. Under these rules, as soon as someone phones the police to report some kind of problem, a crime report is recorded and someone will then have to be held accountable for it. You will hear a lot of bloggers bemoaning this fact, because it puts pressure on front-line officers to make arrests and prosecute people in order to "clear up" the crime reports that have been created.

I think it is time that front-line officers recognised the good done by the NCRS. We used to have to accept that there was a small group of people who would constantly call the police without so much as the mention of a criminal offence. Whereas now, we can now dissuade EVERYONE from calling the police with the threat that if they do, there is a good chance they will come out of it with a criminal record. I'm sure THAT will stop them.

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Copyright of PC Bloggs.

12 Comments:

Anonymous pcr said...

1)Trying to get back together with your ex-partner.
2)Hanging out with your friends.
3)Getting on a tube

1)Er, no, BUT, maybe if you've already had a written warning about not doing that by a big ugly policeman
2)Er, no, BUT maybe if you're asked by a policeman what you are up to and you reply "F*ck off pig", then maybe. Hanging around is not yet a criminal offence. Unfortunately...
3)Er, no. BUT, getting on a tube on a post speed/ coke paranoid downer then not doing what the scary looking policeman with the gun says a few days after a major terorist incident on the tube, then maybe.

As for dissuading people from calling the police, I'll vote for that.

26 October, 2007 19:38

 
Anonymous Very tired PC said...

The link to the NCRS page has this little gem:

"Previously, the police may quite legitimately not have recorded an alleged offence if there was no evidence to support it had occurred."

Surely not? NOT recording a crime just because there was no proof it had ever occurred? How on earth is that sensible?! The new system is clearly much more efficient.

27 October, 2007 04:26

 
Blogger ControlRoomOp said...

In the minds of a lot of our callers hanging out with your friends is against the law.
some common calls:
"There is a group of teenagers playing football on the green, I want them moved on"
THAT'S WHAT ITS FOR!!!!!!

"Some youths are playing in the park and the pavilion was vandalised last week"
--Are these the same youths?
"I don't know but its not their park and you should be telling them to clear off"
--Advice given to caller!!

"There are 3 youths in hoodies sat on the wall outside our premises. Move them on, we were broken into last month"
-- No law yet to prevent people chatting in the street!

And as for the Wayne v Tracey text threat scandal........ don't even go there.
Turn your phone off and go to sleep!!

27 October, 2007 12:02

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

De Menezes didn't get a criminal record, he got 7 9mm rounds in the head - which I admit is funny in the most macabre way possible as you have previously pointed out, but factually inaccurate, which is unusual for you Bloggsy.

27 October, 2007 14:58

 
Blogger PC Bloggs said...

He did get criminalised though, in the moment before they pulled the trigger. At least, I hope they thought he was a criminal.

27 October, 2007 15:19

 
Anonymous Sallycop said...

Just wanted to say I've just read your book Bloggsy and it is the best thing I have read in absolutely years!
Had me wetting myself in places (the sofa, my bed, the bath...)
Can we have a follow up please???

28 October, 2007 12:27

 
Blogger PC Bloggs said...

Thank you sallycop, tell your friends...

28 October, 2007 14:42

 
Blogger MattMacL said...

Don't know if anyone ever reads Newsbiscuit, but your blog, which catalogs your frustration with aspects of police work has an eerie echo their - http://newsbiscuit.com/board/14/41/8//Man-who-left-5-pound-note-in-trouser-poc.html

""A crime is a crime" said a police spokesman. "The more crimes we successfully prosecute, the more we meet the targets the Government has set. It's much easier to solve these ones than the big ones. "

29 October, 2007 15:42

 
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15 April, 2009 09:29

 

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