Stealing the Limelight:

I was appalled by this image.

An important and revered figure has here gone out of his way to promote the needs of young people in the community, only to have his message ruined by the graceless public schoolboy who is blocking half the shot. We can't even see properly whether or not Ryan is actually cradling his bollocks.

David Cameron today spoke out defending his actions.

"I turned my head to one side and raised my hand as if holding a small ministerial file. It's called a turn-hold around here. I just did it for a laugh. I thought it would be fun to show off to the guys at home so I walked across in front of him and made the gesture. My mates thought it was funny. I didn't know he was important until an aide told me later that he's a Benchill Maddog."

Cameron's mother was horrified when she heard what he had done, but she put it down to bravado in front of the cameras. However, a local woman expressed her views more strongly,

"Look at that, wearing a suit. That is disgusting. Disgusting."

Young Ryan chose to gloss over the incident, instead promoting the successes his gang are having in filling the streets with illegal weapons and drugs. Within just five years, Ryan hopes to be shot dead.

We can all learn something from this disgraceful image.

For those of you who are not quite sure what Ryan himself is doing, he is merely selecting a question from the audience, as seen here:

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