This is the official blog of Sgt Ellie Bloggs, a real live police sergeant on the front line of England. It's not the official opinion of my police force, but all the facts I recount are true, and are not secrets. If they don't want me blogging about it, they shouldn't do it. PS If you don't pay tax, you don't pay my salary.


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Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Part One of My Solicitors' Guide

For my non-police readers, solicitors are the guys and gals who show up at the police station to thwart the investigation before it gets as far as court. They are called when the arrested person requests it and their first actions are:

1. Read the custody record.
2. Meet with the police officer in the case (Disclosure).
3. Meet with the "client" (Prisoner).

They have to then advise their client what the best course of action is for the interview. He or she can either:
  • Tell the truth.
  • Make up a lie.
  • Say "No Comment".
If the client chooses to say "No Comment" and later come up with something in court such as, "He hit me first", the court might hold it against them that they didn't tell the police that in the first place. I say "might", because I have yet to see this happen.

The solicitor has to advise his or her client in their "best interest", which means the lowest possible sentence, charge, or get them off completely. Here is a handy guide for budding solicitors to take with them to the police station.


You can also advise "No Comment" if:
  • The custody record shows the client has not slept for 8 hrs.
  • The custody record shows the client has not eaten.
  • The custody record shows a breach of PACE.
This is the Police and Criminal Evidence Act 1984 and if the police have breached it, you have hit the jackpot. No matter how heinous a crime your client has committed, you will be able to get them off at court, therefore do not advise them to do anything as stupid as admitting the offence.

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Copyright of PC Bloggs

8 Comments:

Blogger Lennie Briscoe said...

You are forgetting the invisible CPS lawyers.. They turn up 5 mins before the trial, read the case summary, lose, then go home.

30 August, 2006 10:04

 
Blogger dizzy said...

good blog old man. Very amusing.

30 August, 2006 14:07

 
Blogger dizzy said...

clearly I got the gender wrong there. I do plan to link to you though so please forgive me.

30 August, 2006 14:14

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

PC Bloggs you forgot the other important scenario:1) The DP is banged to rights on CCTV. 2) The DP has the stolen property in his possession at time of arrest. 3) The DP was seen and on CCTV casing the job the previous day. 3) Two witnesses watched the DP commit the crime follow him with no break in continuity and point him out as the offender to the arresting officer. All this equals No Comment! Why because the poor defence brief realises that he can now milk the job through legal aid, wait for the OIC to complete hours of pointless enquiriries and statements re continuity stall the job at Court for at least a year still claiming legal aid. Then finally when the evidence is still too complelling for the not guilty plea, advise his client to go guilty on the day receive a 1/3 off and laugh all the way to the bank!! There's no money in the truth!!!

30 August, 2006 15:40

 
Anonymous laura said...

A solictor can and should be struck off for advising their client (scroat) to lie.... rarely happens thou.

31 August, 2006 01:08

 
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