This is the official blog of ex-Sgt Ellie Bloggs. I was a real live police constable then sergeant for twelve years, on the real live front line of England. I'm now a real live non-police person. All the facts I recount are true, and are not secrets. If they don't want me blogging about it, they shouldn't do it. PS If you don't pay tax, you don't (or didn't) pay my salary.

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Saturday, November 11, 2006

The "YOU" in UNIFORMED policing...

I am constantly amused by the range of slogans adopted by our nation's police forces, which range from the Politically Correct ("Together - Working for Safety and Justice" - West Mercia) to Nauseating ("Putting People First" - Cleveland).

Here are some of my favourites:

  • GMP - "Fighting Crime, Protecting People"
  • Surrey - "With you, making Surrey safer" (talk about poor grammar)
  • Essex - "Taking a lead in making Essex safer" (Taking a lead? Who else is supposed to be making Essex safer?)
  • Staffs - "Be safe, feel safe"
  • The winner for brazenness goes to Warwickshire - "The Safest Place to Be"
These slogans are emblazoned across marked vehicles across the UK to reassure the public and a jolly good job they do too.

I would like to propose the below as Blandshire's new slogan:

Copyright of PC Bloggs.


Blogger ExtraSpecialCopper said...

Scroatsville's is "Protecting the public from their own stupidity"

11 November, 2006 03:10

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Every organisation has to have a 'mission statement' - why? Most of them if not all of them are fatuous, and are never even read or considered by those who may want to use the services offered. there are other more important considerations such as, will they provide that service, will it be ecomomic etc. In the case of the police or other public sector - what's the point? For hospitals - will I come out alive or with all the limbs and other body parts I came in with (other than those that were to be removed for medical purposes of courses) I just think the word POLICE would do.

11 November, 2006 07:48

Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Reassures" me that there are too many cretins wasting time on meaningless platitudes and not enough coppers fighting crime.

Anyone who believes these dimwitted slogans have any positive effect is a complete retard (or ACPO member, or both)

11 November, 2006 08:21

Anonymous depressed copper said...

I think my force's slogan is "We just don't care any more."

11 November, 2006 15:18

Blogger PC South West said...

I think our force has the slogan "detecting Crime for you".

11 November, 2006 16:26

Anonymous Anonymous said...

There's a kebab van parked in a layby down the road from our nick. If the owner ever had a slogan it would be "With you, making e-coli acceptable."

11 November, 2006 17:34

Blogger totallyun-pc said...

what about "THE POLICE, Righting your lifetime of social inadaquacies in thirty minutes, or your money back!"

11 November, 2006 17:37

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I get fed up with police buzzwords. To test how much they are relied upon to "improve" ones career prospects, I applied for a post I had no interest in, and none of the experience. I then formulated my application, filling it with all the flavor of the month words and phrases whilst sounding like the minister for political correctness. I got an interview on the basis of this application. I didn't go mind, it just showed how easy you can BS if you want to.How you can say alot without saying anything useful. Its stuff like this that is putting me off my part 2. I would physically choke having to say some of the things in those scenarios.

11 November, 2006 18:07

Blogger AntiSocialWatch said...

Depressed copper must live in my area cos I'm sure that must be our slogan too.

11 November, 2006 19:27

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Our forces slogan should read "Crime - Together we will record it"

12 November, 2006 14:41

Anonymous ParttimePolisman said...

How about "Cutting costs. Ignoring common sense"

Doesn't have that much of a ring to it... although like some of the mottos it avoids the concepts of policing all together.

Ohhh hang on.... how about some latin to sound wise and circumspect ("BI GLIC-BI GLIC" ?). What about "Semper Vigilo"? Nah that would never work either ;)

12 November, 2006 19:07

Anonymous Anonymous said...

my favourite is that great police voicemail e-mail that did the rounds "SAVING YOUR ASS NOT KISSING IT"

12 November, 2006 19:11

Anonymous NorthernPC said...

How about 'don't f*@king phone us'

13 November, 2006 09:36

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15 April, 2009 11:09


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