I Panicked

I have decided that next time I receive a file back in the internal mail with the inscription: "This is not sufficient, please carry out the following extra enquiries...", I will simply respond with the words, "I am sorry to inform you that PC Bloggs is unable to carry out your request as she died in a paperwork explosion two weeks ago."

It almost worked for a woman caught speeding. Somehow, however, the system found out that she was alive and she has been given a sentence befitting someone who is dead.

This story led me to wonder how many people have gotten out of court cases that way? I for one do not think I would know if someone I arrested last year had died before the case, and would be likely to take it on the word of a black-clad widow at the front counter. Indeed, I am often surprised at how many offenders, victims and police officers are actually still alive by the day of trial. By the same token, I have ruthlessly prosecuted a couple of unfortunate drunks despite their genuine and unpremeditated deaths.

But enough about such paltry matters, what you are all longing to know is: yes, if the offender dies before charge, you can claim a Detection on the grounds that he is unlikely to deny it in court.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Copyright of PC Bloggs.